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When fraudsters create dating profiles, it’s not to find love, it’s to steal money.
They can use techniques to build trust to make someone feel like they’re in a real relationship. This is a type of abuse and more common than you think.
We expose the techniques behind a romance scam.
In a romance scam, fraudsters try to gain control and take advantage through the messages they send. They choose their words carefully to set up, influence and isolate people.
Because they’re being manipulated, warning signs that seem obvious to others are difficult for a person in an online relationship to realise.
This is a real case of a romance scam. Can you identify any of the tricks the fraudster used?
I joined a Facebook group of a film I loved and a member called Paul sent a private message.
We stayed in the group until Paul suggested WhatsApp, where our chat became more about our lives.
We messaged daily and Paul shared photos of himself, some with his daughter. We even spoke on the phone, but Paul never wanted to video call.
Sadly, Paul’s bank account was blocked and he couldn’t get any money.
He sent photos of bank statements showing £1 million was due to clear and more in savings. I agreed to help and sent gift cards and some money.
Suddenly, Paul’s daughter fell ill and needed an urgent kidney transplant. I saw photos of her in hospital and the doctor caring for her sent a message.
Paul was overseas with the army. He asked me to pay the hospital bill, promising to pay me back when his bank was okay to use again. I said yes and had to send money to a lady named Monique, who dealt with the payments for the hospital.
I couldn’t afford to send any more, but Paul suggested I get a loan. This made me nervous, so I told my daughter who made me realise I’d been the victim of a romance scam.
I ended the relationship but lost over £14,500. If I hadn’t told my family, I could have lost a lot more than just my money.
It took me a while to get over Paul, but I’m happy now and with someone I’ve met in person who loves me.
And one last thing: If a relationship feels pressured or secretive, never be afraid to talk to someone about it as it could be a fraudster.
Do you know how to avoid social media scams, an investment scam or what to look out for if a fraudster pretends to be your bank?
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